Corporate Radio Wants us to be Miserable
I want to start this post out by saying fuck off corporate mainstream radio. I mean really, It's bad enough that I've gotta be a wage slave in order to have a cell phone, gas for my car, and a roof over my head(poor poor me). But to be force fed the trash they play eight hours a day, five days a week is enough to make a guy want to take a flying leap off the nearest tall structure. Of course, suicide is not the answer, unless you can make it hilarious or blasphemous.
I just had a long term relationship come to a painful end and I'm currently in the process of trying to move on. I figured working in the back of a dusty, rubber smelling warehouse would be the perfect way to spend some time coming to terms with reality. But I'm having trouble moving on… Why? Because I am being bombarded with sappy break-up songs. Songs engineered specifically to cater to people like me who are confused, who blame themselves for their breakup, who are desperate for human contact, who are worried about their former significant others, and who have bouts of random sadness at inopportune moments.
You'd think I'd be able to tune these tunes out, like I do for any Nickelback song that comes on. I can't, because since I'm emotionally compromised I find myself drawn to the lyrics, sucked into the sorrow and desperation.
THEN after a few of those songs they follow it up with some super love songs, where the person is shocked at meeting someone so amazing, and how totally in love they are, and how they're off to live happily ever after.
But seriously, they do this shit on purpose. They know we are sad and lost. They could be playing fun loving indie rock tunes with skippy electronic licks and happy go lucky lyrics to brighten our days and make us feel better about ourselves. But they don't.
Here's some examples. I don't know the artists, and I really don't care who they are, I just know the lyrics because they are drilled into my brain every day:
"It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now. I said I wouldn't call, but I'm all alone and I need you now."
I've been drunk, and I've needed you now, but I'm too much of a stand up guy to break the boundaries of respect, yet this song wants me to give in and make that call. This song is too catchy. Yes. Every time it comes on, I'm like guuuh, it's that pseudo country pop garbage song, but oh…. I'm mysteriously drawn to it koz its soo fucken catchy and relevant to my situation ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH.
"Why won't you answer me, the silence is slowly killing me, AH YEAH"
Get. Out. Of. my. Head. Way too relevant to my sitation
"Now that you are gone, I realize I'm in looove"
Even though these lyrics are incredibly basic and pathetic I find myself going "Yup…. Uhuh for sure"
"I'm not perfect, but I'll keep trying, cause that's what I said I would do from the start"
This song is terrible. Like, I could take a shit off a bridge, onto a piano and the random hits of my shit pellets would make a better song than this. However, once again the lyrics are relevant to my situation. I did my very best and got a broken heart for it and fuck you asshole singer who sings the same line for 3 minutes straight. I hope you accidentally shotgun a vial of molten glass so you can never again make shitty songs again and plague planet earth with your voice.
Why can't radio play more positive and happy tunes? Perhaps most people find music like this helpful. I know I don't , it's keeping me in a state of sadness and despair, by constantly reminding me of what I've lost and what a fuck up I was. If only I could don some headphones and listen to what I wanted!
I'm not against sappy love songs or sad breakup songs, but it seems like they get the most air time. I could do with some more upbeat stuff while I sift through rubber and my thoughts…
